Jogo de Empresa
Prof. Mark Wolters
"And if you don’t like the people you’re with, you don’t have to work with them, you can just send e-mails! [risos] What? I’m just saying…"
"Grow the fuck up!"
"It’s like Sim City: the real world, but not really." [a propósito do Jogo]
"You don’t have to play this week because these guys are jerks!"
"Dammit, it sucks!"
"’Cause when you invest, that’s the only thing you fucking care about."
"Here in Portugal we’re screwed: we make no fucking money!"
"What the fuck?!"
Estratégia
Prof. José Manuel Fonseca
"Try to avoid an heart surgery. They cut you in half, open up your torso and… well, it’s not very nice."
"Great stuff! «Like»" [acompanhado de um "thumbs up"]
"The next morning, the kid wakes up – ‘cause it’s good to wake up; it means you’re not dead."
"No shit! I did a Business Plan for this thing."
"It’s all ethical; nobody lies in the financial world."
"I come from the place where all the retarders in Portugal come from: Alentejo."
Prof. Bernardo Pimentel
"That’s a kick in the balls of Strategy!"
"Wow, I have a beautiful handwriting."
"It surprises my own memory!"
"Don’t feel obsolete."
Marketing
Prof.ª Paula Matos
"I would like to be respect when I’m present class."
"Implementation, evolution and controlling. Controlling, controlling of everything. Controlling!" [Implementation, evolution and control]
"[The Marketing plan] is not anymore adapted."
"I make some scanners." [I made some scannings]
"If you have a big lost."
"It’s a bit difficulty."
"First, you are going to be followed by Rafael." [medo...!]
"You open your imagination, but not too much!"
"Finally, almost, but not less important…" [aka, Last but not least]
Prof. Rafael Garrido
"How many money (…)?"
"I hope now you can start you Marketing Plan, ‘cause I was told you were a bit lost… [não obtém resposta] You are still lost!?"
Comportamento Organizacional
Prof. Nuno Guimarães da Costa
"We want motivated people, ‘cause just satisfied people might produce 0."
"I only accept undeveloped countries; the only almost developed country I want is Portugal."
"I’m always saying bad things about Portugal, but this is not Portugal; it happened in the United States!!"
"Please, don’t trust your colleagues."
"History? Bleh, show me the money!" [a falar da reacção dos alunos relativamente ao primeiro tópico do Programa]
"I think this is the most interesting topic of the course. OK, now you’re afraid!" [ainda em relação à vertente histórica da Cadeira]
"I do that very often. Try calling to a Call Center and treat them like people."
"(…) and then she gave me her name, which is not normal, ‘cause they have no names; they are talking machines!" [ainda a propósito de pessoas que trabalham em Call Centers]
"This question is perfect. It wasn’t done by me? … Well, it is a really good exam question!"
"The most obvious moment is when you have a child. It’s not the same as a cat or a dog!" [a propósito de comportamentos, responsabilidades e dependências…]
Gestão de Operações
Prof. Manuel Baganha
"If you think of a simple example, for example."
"How many minutes does a person spends in there?"
"Secruty" [Security]
"Look for example, another example."
"And now, problems arrive!"
"Not always you are attend according to the time you arrive."
"It’s the Little Law; not because it’s little, but because it’s the name of someone…"
"What does I know?"
Prof. ª Graça Silva
"Nas minhas turmas só tenho alunos em português."
"Surprise, surprise!"
"Não têm dúvidas, nem existenciais? Nada?"
Sistemas de Informação
Prof.ª Margarida Piteira
"Guys and girls!"
"In this curse…" [course]
"You must have silence!"
"Seven, seven!" [enquanto indica 4 dedos]
"What’s the funny, guys?"
"Not more than two pages maximum."
"You have one points more."
"Tomorrow you have not classes."
"Everyone gives me?" [gave]
[A tentar perceber quem eram os alunos de Intercâmbio naquela turma, dirigindo-se a três de ascendência oriental]
Prof: "You?"
Aluna: "No."
Prof: "You?"
Aluna: "No."
Prof: "Only you?!"
Prof: "First time in Europe?"
Aluno de Intercâmbio: "Yes."
[e continua, para o mesmo aluno] Prof: "First time in Lisbon?"
Prof: "And where are you from?"
Aluna de Intercâmbio: "The United States."
Prof: "Sorry...?"
E para terminar em beleza,
"My message pass to you? My message pass to you? My message pass to you?!"
