Prof. Mark Wolters
“I need a volunteer…” – agarra num aluno ao acaso e levanta-o da cadeira – “Thank you!”
“STOP! They can’t keep up, you’re too smart for them!”
“Yaaaaayyy! Filipe did it!”
“Just because Cristiano Ronaldo knows how to play, you don’t have to listen to what he says, ‘cause he’s kind of… stupid.”
“(…) and because of him I can be here at the best economics faculty in Portugal – if I should thank him? I don’t know…”
“It’s like when a student says «If I was teaching this course …» – well, maybe you’d do a better job than me, so this is a bad example.”
“(…) and if you’re the boss and you think everyone will listen to what you say, you’re fucking crazy!”
“’Cause if you’re a worthless piece of shit no one is going to fucking follow you!”
“You can’t even manage a girlfriend for one week, how can you manage a company for a year?!”
“Oh my God! Is that clock working or is it stopped at the right time?”[acompanhado de uma cara MUITO assustada!]
Estratégia
Prof. José Manuel Fonseca
“It had all sorts of buttons and lights… If you darkened the kitchen, it looked beautiful; it’s just like a Christmas tree!” [a falar sobre uma máquina de lavar loiça]
“Before becoming a professor, I actually worked for 20 years – it’s not something I’m very proud of, but I did.”
“There were people down, promenading their dog – and then I thought to myself «I could have killed a dog!».” [a falar de quando, ao escrever uma tese importantíssima, o computador portátil avariou subitamente e, em jeito de revolta desmedida, o professor pegou nele e o atirou pela janela (das traseiras)]
“(…) and what’s in the book is that bullshit!”
“I will blow your head off while listening to Madonna!” [ao falar de um objecto utilizado para provocar choques eléctricos numa pessoa, que traz consigo um leitor de mp3 (e sim, isto é vendido nos Estados Unidos…!)]
“(…) dull people. Like accountants… People who don’t expect anything from life!”
“When someone gives you Ferrero Rocher, you know that that person doesn’t care a shit about you!”
“Do you feel betrayed by your Strategy Professor? Aaaah, sorry. There will be other disappointments, I promise.”
“Now it’s Snape’s class… Potions!”
“That’s why some people who are missing some teeth go and make some implants: to lie better!”
“Oh, sorry. What an idiot I am!”
“This is my final statement, but this year I’m going to discount this cash flow immediately.”
“It’s a philosopher we have in this country… Teresa Guilherme!”
“No, forget the shareholders; it’s like in real life, they count for nothing.”
“(…) you create a crisis. And then you start writing about ethics. And then… you become a Strategy Professor. Or you become a father or a mother…”
“And when I grabbed the little bastard…” [a falar do nascimento do/a primeiro/a filho/a]
Prof. Bernardo Pimentel
“So they started to open like hell!” [a falar de quando o grupo Jerónimo Martins começou a abrir muitos supermercados Pingo Doce]
“Poor Mickey Mouse and McDonald’s!”
Marketing
Prof.ª Paula Matos
“If I am an agriculture…” [farmer]
“Which is not normally a normal example.”
“(…) better than the «bla bla bla»!”
“(…) but this is more «bla bla bla»!”
“The consumer is a bit limited…”
“People wants to get benefits”
“I’m a white floor” [falando acerca da Farinha (flour) Branca de Neve]
“Have a look on it”
“Because of your Business Forum or whatever!”
Comportamento Organizacional
Prof. Nuno Guimarães da Costa
“Who would NEVER kill someone?” – ninguém se pronuncia – “Who would do it for FUN?!”
Gestão de Operações
Prof. Manuel Baganha
“I cannot reveal everything before class!” [em relação a um conjunto de slides que não estava no site da cadeira]
“480 minutes is how many hours? One day!” [considerando um dia de trabalho de 8 horas]
“We are not never talking about (…)” [afinal, estamos ou não estamos?...]
Prof.ª Graça Silva
“Oh amiguinhos!...”
“Frederico, não olhe p’ra mim com essa cara, que me faz rir!”
